Montreal Chainsmokers Society Sues BLM For Use of Catchphrase “I Can’t Breathe”

MONTREAL, QC: The Montreal Chainsmokers Society is outraged by the cultural appropriation of a long time catchphrase. American protest group Black Lives Matter has stolen the slogan says Annette Lapointe, senior chairperson of the organization. “I’ve been saying I can’t breathe for fifty years,” said Ms. Lapointe through a thick fog. “We first printed that expression on a cigarette case in 1979 and we expect reparations from BLM for the damages caused.”

Tawnisha Breyer-Willis, leader of Black Lives Matter Minneapolis issued a statement to the press. “There’s a reason Canada is called The Great White North. It’s ’cause these people are racist! We ain’t paying nothing!” Ms. Breyer-Willis abruptly ended the conference and stepped into her private jet. ■

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